Clarity is Kind

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With infinite research behind what the meaning of life is and what our purpose of existence is, we can equate this to the fact that human beings do not enjoy being left confused. Humans crave answers, leaving us to consistently search for the understanding of it all. 

Clearly, it seems our generation has not caught on, as we stride with a desire to achieve transparency and be black and white, yet we seem to keep close ties with the gray area. Especially when on the hunt for a significant other, we’ve built a framework of opacity, which has led Generation Z to land in a cycle of situationships and miscommunication. 

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The conversations are had with our friends and silent acknowledgment is exchanged; there is a relationship epidemic swallowing us whole, which causes us to remain at arm’s length with attachment or to become too attached. So will a cure ever be found or are we supposed to adapt to this exhausting system of love? 

VALLEY has a theory, perhaps the cure is dangling directly in front of us, but what holds us back is the fear of how badly injecting the cure may hurt. The cure being … clarity.

We’ve all heard the phrase, “honesty is the best policy” and the reason it’s stuck around for centuries is because of its accuracy. When “talking” with someone, if both sides provide clarity on what they’re looking for, from the start, a lot of relational confusion could be deflected. 

The Three Elements

Unfortunately, society deems conversing intimately as conversations that must be avoided altogether, right? Well, according to Connolly Counseling Centre, “…intimate relationships require intimacy.” 

Whether you’re interested in friends with benefits or committing long-term, intimacy is required to clear the air because clarity is kindness. In order to achieve this successful and intimate conversation, three critical elements must be resolved within yourself: emotional elusion, fear and confusion. 

Avoid Taking Flight

First, recognizing the need to escape from the discussion is a self-confrontation, which should come undone. An unwillingness to be honest about your relational preferences will gauge the direction as to areas of vulnerability you should heal while revealing the thought that now may not be the time to get involved with anyone romantically. 

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Take Down the Fear

Secondly, it’s scientifically proven that fear is inevitable and is a natural part of the emotions we feel as created beings. However, fear must be overcome and in this situation, the fear of rejection becomes a challenge we must defeat to achieve clarity.

If you’re greeted with acceptance of what you’re hoping to gain, with this person then that’s wonderful, but if rejection knocks at the door it’s better that the bandage was torn off before the adhesive seeped deeply into the skin. 

Time to Decide: Overcoming Confusion

Alas, any confusion crowding the air needs to be confronted, but confusion is such a vague noun that shares a relation to the fear and emotional elusion discussed earlier. How do we halt confusion? 

The only way to stop being confused is to decide.

“Living On Purpose And Why Confusion Is Comfortable” – Justin Thomas Miller Blog

Friends, we must decide what we’re looking for and become in tune with the romantic path we’re looking to journey down. Once we are aware of what we’re searching for, we can confidently explain that to those we form a romantic interest in.

If we can take immediate initiative to clarify how we operate amorously, then the continuing guessing game of love association could become the greatest heartbreak this generation could ever encounter. 

Are you willing to break the vicious cycle of relational confusion? If so, share how you plan to with VALLEY on X @VALLEYmag!

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