Honesty is the best policy, right? For the majority of the time, it is. But there are also those times when you should learn to filter what you say. The trick is to understandÂ when the appropriate settings are toÂ switch on the radio edit version of yourself.
Think of it this way: when your grandma asks what you did last Saturday night, maybe you shouldnâ€™t tell her you ended up in a random frat guy’s bed after a little too wild of a night out. A simple â€œOh, me and my besties just did silly girl stuff, Grandmaâ€ would suffice. It would probably earn you a cookie, too.
Clearly, nobody wants to be one of those â€œfakeâ€ people that are seemingly nice to someoneâ€™s face and then rips them apart (figuratively) the moment they walk away. We all know at least one, and we condemn them for being so openly unclassy.
On the other hand, it may be necessary to be somewhat â€œfakeâ€ if it were to spare someoneâ€™s feelings, for example, as long as you’re not cruel about it. You should never give your honest, negative opinion about something that someone cannot change about themselves. Taking this approach canÂ also save you from seeming overly critical, judgemental or like a flat out “biotch.”
â€œYou have to be careful about how you come across to people,â€ says sophomore nutritional sciences major Cassie Collevecchio. â€œIf I am talking with someone who usually annoys me, I have to put up a fake frontÂ so that I donâ€™t hurt their feelings.â€
It can be beneficial to edit what you reveal in a professional setting, as well. When your success depends on it, try telling people what they want to hear. This isnâ€™t to say change who you are; rather, present a different version of yourself. So, at your next interview, keep the fact that you sometimes panic and sweat profusely while under pressure to yourself. While weâ€™re at it, maybe think about bringing deodorant to work if you score the job, too.
For your own sake, itâ€™s best to not always be so honest with your family. They love you, they are there for you, but they do not need to know everything. Letâ€™s say you and your boyfriend get in a huge fight. Well, obviously, you would only share your side of the story with your family. And after a few fights, your family may start to hate the guy!
If thereâ€™s not a special someone in the picture, then this is your opportunity NOT to reveal to them every sporadic hookupÂ youâ€™ve had. Then again, hopefully thatâ€™s not too much of a habit for you already.
One last note on honesty: the past is the past. Itâ€™s okay to conveniently â€œforgetâ€ things that have happened in order to move forward. Just saying.