I Let My Guy Friends Do My Makeup

GuysDoMakeUp.JosePonte1If you love watching makeup videos on YouTube as much as I do, then you’ve probably seen this highly amusing tag before. Yes, it is the terrifying yet hilarious: “My boyfriend/guy friend/brother/whatever male you know does my makeup” tag. Upon hearing this tag for the first time, many of you probably cringed. Heck, I mean, I did. The thought of a male coming at me with eyelash curlers doesn’t sound too appealing. But hey, if all the YouTube beauty gurus out there can do it, I can sacrifice an eyelash or two.

So, I asked two of my guy friends, Kojo Baiden and Matt McLean, to give me a makeover that would make me look party ready. Not telling them what any of the makeup products were, I laid out my makeup and let the frenzy ensue. Here are the hysterical results. (P.S. Despite the amount of blackmail I could get for this, I even added pictures… you’re welcome).

Face

The boys seemed mystified with the amount of makeup products and brushes that were in front of them. They struggled to find where to start.   Kojo’s first words upon inspecting my foundation were: “L’oreal… what?!”

Eventually they decided to start out with foundation, as Matt confidently knew what this was. Taking my blush brush, Matt poured three huge quarters’ worth of foundation into his hands. When applying foundation all I heard was “Oh my god. Oh my god… At least it matches her skin…”

After a few minutes of doing this, they began to get incredibly confident. They started throwing in phrases like “this is a good palette” and calling each other “Professor.” It began to get rough, as they told me to close my mouth, and proceeded to put foundation on my lips.

My inner monologue at this time:

“Oh my god. Oh my god… At least the foundation matches my skin tone.  Why is there foundation in my mouth? This tastes pretty nasty.”

Eyes

After the foundation, they decided to move to the eyes.

Kojo: “Now the mascara for the eyebrows!”

Matt: “… What? You mean for the eyelashes…?” Applies the mascara properly.

Kojo: “I have no idea what I’m doing… Is this the eyebrow thing…? Now for the mascara!”

My inner monologue: I realize that Kojo thinks everything related to eye makeup is called mascara.

Kojo then decides to go for the eye shadow. This is where catastrophe hits. As he picks the brightest green out of my makeup palette, he begins to smear it over my top lid. As a makeup guru would do to her viewers, Kojo explains: “I’m doing this as my first base.” He then proceeds to put every single eye shadow color on my lids as a second layer. Matt then begins the same process underneath my eyes. Realizing how bad this looks, Matt asks “is there an eraser?”.

Eyebrows

Kojo then excitedly moves to the section he has been waiting for this entire time: the eyebrows. Grabbing an eyeliner pencil, Kojo begins to fill in my eyebrows and manages to add in extra half an inch to them. He has successfully made me look like an Asian Frieda Kahlo. Matt all of sudden stops from brushing out the clumps of mascara from my lashes and yells “WHAT ARE YOU DOING KOJO?! Let’s apply foundation to fix it.”

Inner Monologue: “Men think foundation can fix anything.

Lips

Once the eyes were perfected, Matt and Kojo thought lipstick would be the finishing touch.

Matt: “Oh this one’s the best one!” Matt pulls out my black lipstick. Enough said.

Inner monologue: Total confusion and worry.

Final Reveal

After this incredibly amusing makeover, I think I’m going to stick to doing my own makeup.  But overall I would say not bad. I would give it a solid 2.5 stars out of 5 stars. I may look like a zombie, but, hey, maybe some guys find that attractive. A great thank you to my makeup artists Matt and Kojo.

Photo by Jose Ponte; FInal photos provided by Sarah Kim

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