We are all #TeamToxic When it Comes to Love

A little toxicity adds spice and drama into our lives. The taste may be sour after, but we are all attracted to it one way or another. We are all on #TeamToxic when it comes to favoring either Conrad or Jeremiah from Amazon Prime’s series, “The Summer I Turned Pretty.” Each episode continues to unfold more drama, romance, and deeper rooted issues within ourselves when fans favor Conrad over Jeremiah and vice versa.  

Conrad is for the emotional unavailable girlies  

Conrad is the teen boy character that always has a problem that we all fall in love with because we see a “good side” in him. Throughout the series, Conrad acts hot and cold towards Belly, and cannot communicate his feelings even if everything depended on it. He embodies the average emotionally unavailable partner that leaves us grasping for more than what is originally there.  

Men like Conrad leave breadcrumbs, leading the partner to ingest every small moment, and crave for more. His behaviors and actions unveil an avoidant attachment style that us people pleasers tend to attract towards. On the reciprocating end, the people pleasers crave love and fear abandonment from their avoidant partner, only pushing them away more. It is the perfect storm between anxious and avoidant attachment styles in this type of relationship.  

The people pleasers who love Conrad also want to fix him too. The classic phrase, “I can fix him,” describes perfectly the relationship displayed between people like Conrad and those who desire to be the one who changed the unfixable.   

photo from Pinterest.com

If Jealous and Competitive is your type, Jeremiah is the one for you  

On the surface, Jeremiah is the ultimate golden retriever boyfriend who genuinely cares and displays affection to their partner, but has underlying jealousy issues. Jeremiah does not enjoy the attention Belly receives from Conrad, and feels the need to compete with him and Belly’s relationship to prove its superiority.

This type of partner seeks validation from others to ensure their feelings, yet is not secure enough to handle any outsider’s attention towards their significant other.  

Sometimes we are attracted to the obsession and attention from someone rather than the actual person. It feels good to feel wanted immensely by someone who you feel attracted to. The line between envy and acts of adoration continues to blur throughout the relationship.

The jealousy creates mixed signals for love and loyalty instead of insecurity from the partner. We become biased to little comments like “Why did this person text you” or “Why did he follow you on Instagram” and assure us that our partner is acting protective and loving us too much.  

Jeremiah is for the people who crave love and attention, glorifying it to a point of fantasy and bypassing any red flags. Jeremiah fans love fairy-tale endings and romance displayed in cheesy movies, turning oblivious to their partner’s tendencies to project their insecurities onto their partner.

It is anxious attachment latching onto another anxious attachment partner, creating one giant ball of abandonment issues and fear of being underappreciated.  

Why are we attracted to people who are not good for us?  

Living in a perfect world clearly does not exist, so it is inevitable to love people who may not be the best fit. Being an unfit partner is not one-sided, as everyone behaves and reacts differently to given situations. Also, we are creatures of habit, taking every past experience and applying it to our lives, specifically our relationships. We are all predictable, and it takes us to realize why we attract partners with consistent toxic traits.  

Do you think we are all a little toxic? Let us know by tagging @VALLEYmag on Instagram or Twitter!



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