Selena Gomez’s Heartfelt Single “Lose you to Love Me”

Photo from nme.com

The day has finally arrived. Selena Gomez is officially back with new music after four years since releasing her last album, “Revival.” Gomez has only been releasing singles in between the years; while these songs were still amazing, Gomez is finally starting a new era. Her new song “Lose You to Love Me” was released on Oct. 23. Since Gomez has been out of the spotlight for some time, fans are excited to get a glimpse into how Gomez has been feeling by taking a deeper look at her new lyrics.

The Lyrics

“You promised the world and I fell for it / I put you first and you adored it

Set fires to my forest / And you let it burn

Sang off key in my chorus / ‘Cause it wasn’t yours”

It’s pretty certain that this song is about Justin Bieber, who Selena has been in an on-again-off-again relationship with since 2009. Gomez sings about how she constantly put Bieber first in the relationship, despite him “burning” her time and time again.

“I saw the signs and I ignored it / Rose-colored glasses all distorted

Set fire to my purpose / And I let it burn

You got off on the hurtin’ / When it wasn’t yours, yeah”

Gomez sings about ignoring any signs that her and Bieber should not be together. Fans of Gomez will know she also referenced this feeling in “The Heart Wants What It Wants,” singing that even though there was a “million reasons” why she should give him up, Gomez still wanted to be with him. Fans have also pointed out that the lyric “Set fire to my purpose” may be a reference to Bieber’s latest album.

“We’d always go into it blindly / I needed to lose you to find me

This dancing was killing me softly / I needed to hate you to love me, yeah

To love, love, yeah / To love, love, yeah

To love, yeah / I needed to lose you to love me, yeah

To love, love, yeah / To love, love, yeah

To love, yeah / I needed to lose you to love me”

Fans have pointed out a parallel between this “dancing” lyric and one of Gomez’s past songs from 2013, “Love will Remember.” The song has a lyric that sings “Somewhere in forever we’ll dance again.” This dancing may be a metaphor for the constant breaking up and getting back together the couple went through, and Gomez recognizes that she can’t do it anymore. She sings about how she needed to lose Bieber in order to love herself, an important message for people to hear. 

“I gave my all and they all know it / You turned me down and now it’s showing

In two months you replaced us / Like it was easy

Made me think I deserved it/ In the thick of healing, yeah”

“Jelena’s” relationship, as it was known to the world, was constantly in the spotlight, with the media and public judging the couple from the outside looking in. Gomez sings about how the world saw that she gave her everything to the relationship, and it still did not work out. One of the most telling lyrics of the song is when Gomez mentions being replaced in just two months. She and Bieber reunited in October 2017 after a long separation. The two were even spotted spending Valentine’s Day 2018 together. However, after separating in March of 2018, Bieber started dating Hailey Baldwin just two months later, as Gomez calls out in the song. Incredibly, Bieber and Baldwin got engaged in July 2018. Gomez sings about how she was made to “think I deserved” all of this at a time when she was still trying to recover and heal from the breakup.

(Chorus repeated)

“And now the chapter is closed and done

To love love, yeah / To love love, yeah

To love, yeah / And now it’s goodbye, it’s goodbye for us”

 As Gomez explained in an interview with Ryan Seacrest, “These two songs were me wrapping up a chapter in a pretty little bow. The rest of the album is where I am now and where I’m going.” Those who have followed Gomez’s journey realize how much growth this song represents. After trying to close this chapter for so many years, Gomez has finally voiced her feelings and now wants to focus her music on herself. While this of course is a sad and painful song, it’s also a song about learning how to love yourself and coming out of something stronger.

The Music Video

The “Lose You to Love Me” video is entirely in black and white with different shots of Gomez singing the song. In the interview with Seacrest, Gomez related the video to a previous music video of hers, also shot entirely in black and white, “The Heart Wants What It Wants.”

Going there (how she felt during “The Heart Wants What It Wants”) to where I am now is the greatest feeling.

The music video starts with Gomez sitting down at a chair with glass in front of her. Gomez explained that she wanted it to look like she was sitting down at a confessional, releasing all of her pain and letting go of all the emotions she has withheld in the past. Gomez is seen making different facial expressions throughout the video, ranging from frustrated to confused to amusement. The video is shot in a very raw and real way (and on the new iPhone too). By the end, however, Gomez is seen smiling and at peace as she says goodbye to this chapter of her life. 

Look At Her Now

 While fans were still absolutely obsessing over this new song, Gomez decided to release ANOTHER track titled “Look at her Now.” This pairing of songs is truly a transition from a ballad to a bop.

 Gomez explained in interviews that this song was released “for the fans” in order to thank them for sticking by her side through such difficult times and to let them know that she’s okay now.

 Compared to “Lose You to Love Me,” this song is upbeat and fun; additionally, the music video is entirely in color. This stark contrast from the previous is a physical representation of how Gomez has grown over time.

“Of course, she was sad / But now she’s glad she dodged a bullet

Took a few years / To soak up the tears

But look at her now / Watch her go”

 Gomez acknowledges the pain she went through, and then, referring to herself in the third person, sings about where she is now in life, which is a much better place mentally.

She sings that this entire process has even “made her more of a woman,” emphasizing the fact that it’s possible to come out of painful situations stronger.

 With everything she has been through, fans are beaming to have Gomez back releasing new music and sharing her story. Her personal lyrics are extra special to listeners who have gone through similar experiences as well.

This song was inspired by many things that have happened in my life since releasing my last album. I want people to feel hope and to know you will come out the other side stronger and a better version of yourself.

It’s safe to say that Gomez is back and ready to release her music to the world. She even mentioned in an interview with KIIS FM that she has created 24 songs. If only we knew when the next song will come!

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