5 Stages of Grief During First Exams

DSCN2181September is in full swing and that can only mean one thing to Penn State students: exams are coming. It’s been a wonderful few weeks of relaxing and doing a few reading assignments here and there, but let’s face it: sylly week is long gone and exams are upon us. There are many emotions we feel when we realize that we’ll be taking exams soon, but most of them can be broken down into Kubler-Ross’s Five stages of Loss and Grief.


We’ve only been back for a few weeks; exams can’t really be starting already. I probably wrote down the wrong date. I’m just going to assume that I made a mistake and go out every night this weekend, because it was just syllabus week, right?


I’ve checked Angel and realized that I didn’t write down the wrong date. I really do have an exam this week. How could my professor be so hateful to schedule an exam when we’ve only been back for a month?! I had plans to watch the entire fifth season of Gossip Girl this week, and now I’m stuck studying. I. Am. Not. Happy.


Maybe I can fake an illness and get an excuse to take the exam later. Maybe I can tell my professor that my pet goldfish died and I’m way too devastated to even think about studying. Maybe I don’t have to study, I mean it is the first exam right? Can I bomb this one and still pass the class?


All my roommates went to Baby’s for half-price milkshakes and I’m stuck at home studying. I ate an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s for dinner and I’m on the verge of a mental breakdown. I want to drop out of school and become an exotic dancer.


I have to take this exam whether I like it or not. If I suck it up and study for a few days, I can ace this exam and then I’ll be able to binge watch Netflix with no guilt. If I fail, I’ll just eat another pint of Ben & Jerry’s and everything will be good in the world again.

Photo by Jackie Stumm

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