Is Romance Dead?

Hankins_IsRomanceDead_02When I see an older couple holding hands, or passionately gazing into the other’s eyes, my heart cannot resist but to melt. The romance is there and it’s more alive than ever before. For our generation, however, the majority of us consider romance to be dead.

I can’t help but to believe that women have been brainwashed a false perception of romance. We’ve grown up mesmerized by Disney fairytales, teaching us that our Prince Charming will one day arrive to magically sweep us off our feet. And to, of course, live happily ever after. But really, who came up with this? Love isn’t a fairytale and it surely isn’t a classic Hollywood movie.

If you beg to differ, ask those that have endured the longest of marriage and true love. Those that have withstood the test of time will tell you that it’s nothing of a fairytale. Just because it’s not what we’ve always imagined, however, doesn’t mean that it’s not romantic love.

Sometimes I feel sorry for the boys who have to do the wooing. Great pressures are placed on them to be romantic and make a girl fall head over heels in love. If there really is a thing as “love at first sight,” truly they feel the heat.

And just as I feel sorry for them, I feel sorry for us. For the girls who live thinking they have to be a princess to meet their Prince Charming, it’s not easy meeting such expectations. We place all of our effort into making ourselves physically appealing and desirable that we forget about class and charm.

Love isn’t perfect, so don’t expect perfect. Expect real.

Most women fall under the belief that there’s no good guys out there, or that all the good ones are taken. Until you have become close enough to judge the morals of a person, I encourage women to stop stereotyping men as “good” or “bad” by a superficial introduction.

And for men, I encourage you to not judge a women by her outside appearance. No matter what she’s wearing, or what you think she’s suggesting, hidden behind her clothes and makeup is a girl who wants to be loved.

We’re constantly engaging in a miscommunicated battle of the sexes. And it’s nothing romantic, that’s for sure.

I mean really, what’s romantic about a relationship post on Facebook? Nothing.

Today, we have too much going on in our lives and too many places to be that we forget to think about acts of romance.

Flowers take time to order and pick up. When was the last time you received a love letter in the mail? If your my age, probably never. They are nearly inexistent, instead replaced with “luv ya” and “ILY<3” text messages. Why go to the movies when it can be ordered online?

But one thing that hasn’t changed is communication. It’s obvious that men think women are complicated enough, so don’t go along wishing for romance and never say so. If you’d like to go out for a movie or walk in the park, tell him. I’m sure no guy would oppose to suggestions.

The structure of marriage has altered, as well. With a greater number of women working and men helping at home, roles of romantic, intimate relationships are greatly different compared to past generations. Today it’s about being together, working together and loving together.

It’s time for the women to step out of their comfort zone and initiate some romance. Like marriage, romance isn’t a one way street. Grab his hand, make a homemade meal and kiss when least expected.

And when a guy is romantic, don’t back down. If a man finds you to be special, he’ll treat you right. Let him treat you to some real-life romance, even if takes you by surprise.

The way to a woman’s heart hasn’t changed. Romance is there, it’s merely hidden behind our unrealistic expectations. In our crazy schedules of life, breathe easy, love greatly and make time for forgotten romance.

Photography by Tyler Hankins 

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