Valentine’s Day is right around the corner, which means it’s right about that time for those of us who are single to start asking ourselves: A. Why am I single? B. When will I meet that special someone? and finally, C. Will I die alone in a house filled with 10 cats?
Highly negative thoughts here, ladies. Nothin’s gonna come of being a Negative Nancy.
While it’s true that meeting someone special in a school filled with so many potential candidates is hard, we need to stop looking for love in all the wrong places (i.e. frats, parties and anywhere where you run the risk of never seeing said person again). The fact is: no guy at a party wants to get to know you. He wants to get all up on you.
And it’s safe to say that every girl deserves better than that. We are all unique, beautiful, intelligent and strong women, are we not? That’s what I thought.
We need a man who will listen, and who wants to actually get to know us. So where do we find this man?
That’s right. Shopping for a man in your classes has the potential to lead to the most fulfilling relationships, and here’s why:
You’ve got a common interest.
Unless it’s a Gen Ed class that you need to graduate, there is a reason that you’ve signed up for this course specifically. Maybe you find the topic interesting, maybe it’s a major course. Either way he has probably signed up for the same reason. This means that you’ve already got something in common, which is a fundamental.
You see each other in a professional environment.
Chances are, when you go to class you’re not inebriated or prone to ridiculous behavior. Rather, you’re contributing intelligent comments to class discussion, or asking provocative questions. Seeing you when you’re serious (and sober) can give the guy an idea of what you’re really like and how you think. You’re a person, not just a body in a hot outfit.
Plus, seeing how your class cutie behaves in class is a good way for you to judge his personality as well.
So what happens when you’ve found a guy worthwhile and you’re willing to dip the pen in company ink? How you proceed depends on what you’re looking for. Are you looking for something serious or just a hook up? When we’re all essentially trained experts in the casual relationship, taking it slow and getting to know someone can be intimidating and foreign.
But the higher the risk, the higher the reward.
So, how do you get closer to the class cutie? It’s actually pretty simple: just talk to him.
While girls spend most of their time overanalyzing their next move, it’s important to realize that guys don’t do this.
“We’re pretty much oblivious,” says Nick Welsh, a sophomore who is in a serious relationship with a girl he had met in class, “we’re not going to pick up subtle hints.”
So ladies, drop the mind games and play fair: use your personality!
“Humor is always, in my opinion, the best way to break the ice,” says Welsh. “Relating something that ties you together—like the class—and joking about it is a way to really connect with someone easily.”
Also, keep in mind that making the first move is a relief, and shows that you’re confident.
“We have that social pressure on our heads so whenever the girl makes the first move it’s really refreshing,” Welsh says.
Ultimately, “Be funny, take it slow, and don’t have any preconceived notions of where you want things to go–you have to walk before you can run. You have to know the person before you want to jump in their pants,” he wisely advises.
So start shopping in your classes, ladies. Your dream man might be right under your nose!
Photo by Grace Shyu