It was a typical Friday Night. You were out with your girls at a friend’s frat house—Delta-something. Or was it Sigma? Gamma? Doesn’t matter. You were having a good night. Not to mention you were talking to a very cute guy who was a brother of the frat. You two were hitting it off; he got your number and you had lunch plans for tomorrow.
Well, the night ended and tomorrow came. It was around lunch time and you were on your way to Panera for your little date. You couldn’t decide whether you were more nervous or excited to see your guy from last night. You get to Panera and end up waiting a half hour before you begin to think you’ve been stood up. Just then, a guy walks in. Vineyard Vines hat, backwards of course. Ralph Lauren shirt. And Sperry’s. He sees you and waves. It was at that moment when you realized you’ve caught yourself a frat boy; and not the one who likes to keep a tally on his headboard titled “Hottie Hookups.” Oh girl, no. You’ve just reeled in a frat boy who is looking for love (a rare but real type).
You listen to the stories about him and his brothers shot gunning Natty Lite the other Tuesday night, and you try to be nice as he brags about the guy he kicked out the other day because the kid didn’t know anyone from the frat to get him into the party.
An hour of his frat themed stories and you knew this had to stop. Your frat boy didn’t have the same idea though, and he invited you to another party his frat was having tonight. You don’t want to be rude so you say yes.
Now what? He seems head over heels and if you break his heart you’ll probably be cut off from the frat- and that’s where all your friends go on the weekends.
Don’t worry girl—after much “Frat Guy” studying and close encounters with the looking for love type, Valley has devised the perfect plan on “How to Lose a Frat Guy in 10 Days”.
1. Always ask to bring your girls
This is how it should always be, but in this case it will allow you to giggle with your girls instead of having to make small talk with your frat boy on how well he made the jungle juice. Be sure to create a signal when you want to run to the bathroom to get away from an unwanted situation- such as your frat boy trying to introduce you to his brothers.
2. Avoid being introduced to the brothers
Avoid this situation at ALL costs. This will only lead him on more and give all other potential dance partners a big sign that you’re off limits. Bathroom breaks are the best excuse, but sometimes it’s fun to play a little game out of it and be like a super spy who is trying not to get caught on a mission. Pretty much, the more extreme limits you go to to avoid him the better.
3. Ask for the expensive stuff
We all know that frat guys who live in the house have their own stash of alcohol, and it’s way better than Natty Lite will ever be. So put on your best baby voice, and ask him for the good stuff. He may say no at first, in which case you can either resort to a pouty face until he gives in, or just whine and whine and whine some more. He’ll give in.
4. That Vineyard Vines Hat? Make it yours
Girls wear Vineyard Vines hats too- and they look better most of the time on us. So feel free to make his treasured Vineyard Vines hat yours and tell him it looks “sooooooo good” and you just “looooooveeee it.” Before he has a chance to object, thank him for your new hat.
5. Bring in your dancing girls
Your girls are going to be your biggest supporters through these 10 days. Be sure to dance with your girls only, maybe an occasional cute guy. Try to mainly stick with your girls to avoid your fray boy getting into a fight and throwing an innocent guy out of the house.
6. If you do meet the brothers….
He finally caught you long enough to introduce you to his brothers, so make the most of this opportunity. No one knows your frat guy better than his brothers, and no one likes to make fun of him as much as they do. Take advantage of this and talk about the time you shot gunned a beer faster than him. True or not, his brothers will take the bait in an instant despite his denying it. Let the chaos ensue, and go back and dance with your girls.
7. Breakdown the Bragging
Every frat guy loves to boast about just anything they can consider boast worthy. So be ready to call him out the next time he makes a trip to Dunkin Donuts seem heroic.
8. Do Some of Your Own Bragging
Go out with to another frat one night and talk nonstop about it the next day. Be sure to mention how great everything was- even if it wasn’t all that great.
9. Tickets to His Favorite Show—That He Doesn’t Get to See
In the spirit of “How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days,” snag some tickets to someone he’s dying to see at the BJC. Here’s the catch, do whatever you can to not let him actually see the show. Ask for drinks and food and say you need him to get the T-shirt now before they’re all sold out. Later, proceed to talk about how spectacular the show was.
10. If all else fails…
Give the poor guy a chance. If he has been able to put up with all that you’ve just put him through he might be a decent guy who really has feelings for you. Try to see past all the frat he’s got going on, and give him a chance.