Sex in the City … of State College

Watching a group of four single female best friends navigate the dating scene in New York is undeniably one of the most entertaining realities to watch on screen. Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda all bring unique personalities, interests, looks and sex lives to the table; proving that even women who connect on a meaningful level, live completely different sex lives even while residing in the same city. 

Sex in the City depicts single women in their 30s in New York City once they’ve discovered themselves and established their careers … but what was their dating history before being working women in New York?

What would it have looked like if they were studying in State College? 

Samantha

Samantha’s first mission after arriving to Penn State as a freshman would have been to finesse her way into a highly regarded sorority. She would see it as her first step to seamlessly spread awareness of her premature, yet already intense, sex drive. 

After initiation, her second goal would be to explore the men in every single fraternity. Once checking off every fraternity on the ranked list, in no particular order, she’d move on to the sports teams. She’d definitely dabble in football players first, then hockey, some basketball, create consistently available baseball booty calls, and even sleep with some wrestlers.  

Samantha’s name would be very well known within the male student body at Penn State, quickly. Making her the obvious pick for social chair of whatever top sorority she’d be a member of.  

As a senior, Samantha would have run through so much of the student body that she’d resort to Hinge to discover new options. When she wasn’t meeting up with one of her matches for dinner with a side of sex, she’d enjoy a drink at P man’s knowing she’d bump into at least a handful of her old prospects. 

Miranda

Miranda would be the most education focused of the group. She’d prioritize her criminology major and the position as president of a law frat that she was awarded in her junior year. She’d be the friend they’d have to beg to go out instead of studying and ending the night with some Chinese takeout from Big Bowl.  

Although Miranda’s number one priority would be school, her second would be indulging in casual sex whenever the opportunity presented itself. She’d hook up with a few guys in her law frat, have phone sex with some old hookups from home, and even try to seduce a professor once, just to prove she was sexy enough to make him fold. 

By Senior year, after turning 21, Miranda would request a trip to the Shandy Gaff with the girls to celebrate. They’d make great memories, and Miranda would find herself gravitating towards a bartender that she’d end up taking home at the end of the night. After inviting him back a few times and developing a more serious situationship, she’d find out that he was a fifth year with no idea where he was going in life. That stark difference in their characters would have eventually ended their passionate relationship upon her graduation. 

Charlotte

Charlotte would have arrived at Penn State scarred from the abrupt breakup she had with her long-term High school boyfriend. He would have broken up with her going into the summer of their senior year because he “didn’t want to miss out on the college experience.” Charlotte would have been so smitten with their comfortable love that being newly single and moving to State College would really scare her. 

Fortunately, her successful rush experience would open up all kinds of new doors. Getting a bid for KKG was all she needed to forget about her past and start mingling with the guys in her present. She would have initially gravitated towards the fraternity guys who were going to college solely to socialize, as they’d be sitting on large inheritances that gave them the kind of ego and status that granted them a bid for a top fraternity. After being relentlessly disappointed by their inability to commit to anything but a weeklong bender, she’d move on to the finance bros who didn’t associate with Greek life and were driven by money and success. 

By senior year, Charlotte would be more ok with settling, than the thought of leaving State College single. One night while stumbling all the way back to the Rise from Champs, she’d have met a man who insisted he walk her home … and the rest would be history. 

Carrie

Carrie would have not only been the glue but also the magnet that brought their friend group so close in the first place. Although she would have never been involved in Greek life, she’d be recognized as the social butterfly who invited everyone to her dorm for pre-games at the beginning of the fall semester. The girls would have united as one while taking shots in Carrie’s dorm to silence the social anxieties that came with being young and going out on a brand-new town. 

Carrie would meet a guy within her first week at Penn State who would steal her heart. They’d have frequent innocent sleepovers, and even walk each other to and from class because of how much they enjoyed each other’s company. Since Carrie would lose her virginity to him in her first semester at school, she wouldn’t let him go even after he’d joined a fraternity and become emotionally unavailable. Throughout her time at Penn State, if she’d accidentally get too drunk, she’d always find herself giving him a call or making her way to his parties, both usually ending in a not-so-innocent sleepover. 

Nonetheless finding her role as an editorial writer for VALLEY, would keep her head on straight. She’d have messed around with a few guys in the creative division and picked up film majors or your average skater dude while writing her articles at Webster’s. 

Imagining Samantha, Miranda, Charlotte and Carrie at Penn State re-instills the original story’s main message; even the people you connect with the closest, will have different journeys, experiences, and ultimately very different sex lives. 

Tweet us, @VALLEYmag, letting us know which character you relate to most!

*VALLEY does not support underage drinking. Please remember to always drink responsibly.*

Related