We Accept the Love We Think We Deserve

“What did I do to deserve this?”

This is the question you may ask yourself as you sit there staring at the little red arrow on your phone that reads “Delivered 12 hours ago.” They were feeling extremely chatty the day before, but now, nothing. How can someone be so on and off? They give you just enough to keep you around and then disappear yet again. Why do you keep putting up with it? The truth is, we accept the love we think we deserve. So, the second that little red arrow turns into a little red square, we’re jumping with joy.

You’re Not Going to be Forever Alone Just Because You Have Standards

Oftentimes, you’ll settle for the bare minimum simply because you don’t think anyone will ever be able to live up to your standards—especially not college guys. So, you’ll put up with opening your own doors and receiving a text at 12 a.m. after you haven’t heard from them all day.

It’s okay, though, because they were just busy. You can hear your friend’s distant voice telling you, “You can do better,” but what do they know? They’re in a happy relationship. You convince yourself that it’s this person or no one; if you don’t stay with them and put up with these things, you’ll die alone and never be in a relationship again.

The Borderline Alcoholic Who Never Goes to Class is Not the Love of Your Life

“But I can fix him!” No, no, you cannot fix him. We are all in college, ranging from 18 to 22 years old. A little challenge is sometimes fun, but never get too wrapped up in the challenge. It will only destroy your own mental health. You know you’re too involved when you start to genuinely believe that you can fix them.

They are an adult; if they wanted to be fixed, they would have done it themselves. Not to mention, you’re no one’s mother. It’s not your job to be taking care of these babies with beards.

Put Yourself First

The love of your life isn’t going to have you questioning your self-worth daily. The love of your life will let you know how special you are, that you deserve the world. We accept the love we think we deserve because we think having standards or thinking highly of ourselves is too much. So, you settle for the frat boy or the one who’s out at the bars from Thursday to Saturday.

Just because you’re not actively in a relationship doesn’t mean you’re going to end up alone. Patience is a virtue, and you’ll end up where you’re supposed to be. You may think everyone has someone, but they don’t. Some people choose not to, and others are in the same situation as you. Don’t settle for a subpar relationship just so you aren’t alone; just give it a little more time, and all of your waiting will be worth it.

What’s your opinion on accepting the love you think you deserve? Let us know on our Instagram @VALLEYmag!

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