As the new year kicks in, many people look back on all that they have accomplished as a way to highlight the year they are saying goodbye to. Many people avoid taking this time to reflect on those missed opportunities or failures. We tend to treat our failures like something to hide, a sign that we weren’t enough or didn’t try hard enough. Failing is as much a part of the growing process as any of the other steps. In fact, without failure, there would be no success. When we fail, we reflect, we put in more effort and we grow from our mistakes. Take some time before the new year to not only reflect on your losses, but also celebrate them.
Courage Never Goes Out Of Style
When you celebrate your losses, you celebrate the courage it took to try in the first place. All the missed opportunities, the heartbreaks, the academic flops, the career detours and the financial face plants will be worth it in the end. No matter what the initial goal was or how the outcome turned out, there is always a lesson to be learned. Relationships that didn’t work? You learned what you truly need. A class that nearly defeated you? You discovered how resilient you really are. A personal goal abandoned halfway? Maybe you realized you were chasing someone else’s version of success.
All the effort you put into a task does not vanish because you did not reach the goal. You just have to shift your focus slightly from your intended outcome to what is in front of you. You should be proud of believing in yourself, trusting your supporters and giving it your all. At the end of the day, that should be enough. Those are the key foundations to great success in the future. If you had not been courageous enough to at least try, you would have been left with a life filled with doubt and regret.
Where Would You Be Without Loss
If all we did was win, that would simply be luck, and we would never learn what we are great at or where our limits are. In life, there are hundreds of opportunities for trial and error in order for us to become the people we can only dream of being. As your own personal cheerleader, celebrating your losses doesn’t mean glamorizing pain; it means recognizing the wisdom you gained through it.
When people set out goals for themselves, they believe the difficult part will be reaching the goal. You should be proud of yourself for trying in the first place, because that is the greatest challenge. It is because you have failed in the past that you can put yourself out there and pick yourself back up if you have to. Growing up and learning from what you have failed to do could have only brought you closer to yourself. Through this process, you allow yourself to be vulnerable.
Sending Love To All The Could Haves
There is an overwhelmingly popular ritual to write the year off, enjoying all your wins. VALLEY highly recommends you also take some time to not only reflect on but also celebrate the lessons you may have learned along the way. These losses brought you closer to your goals by teaching you the ropes and new strategies to take, but also brought you closer to yourself by giving you a chance to understand your needs better.
At this time, you should forgive and thank yourself for failing, and you should also forgive those who have failed you. Loss and failure are not tied solely to ourselves and the tasks we have attempted, but also to those who have let us down.
Through these letdowns, we have also learned lessons. Not everyone is meant to be in our lives forever, and that is okay. In order for their absence to be appreciated, you have to forgive and love what you learned through their presence. As the year resets, let your losses be more than quiet footnotes. Let them be the bold, underlined chapters that shaped you. Celebrate the risks you took, the lessons you earned, and the person you’re becoming — not despite your losses, but because of them.
Think on all your wins and losses this year and tag us @VALLEYmag on Instagram!
