The internet has always loved to popularize all kinds of personality quizzes. There are the obvious ones — the MBTI test and the Enneagram test. However, TikTok specifically has introduced us to unique and surprisingly accurate tests. One of these has blown up recently, and people have felt inclined to interpret their results in several different ways.
The “Are you a Soldier, a Poet or a King?” quiz is based on the song “Soldier, Poet, King” by the Oh Hellos. Each of the three titular figures represents a personality or a description that you are assigned once you’ve completed the quiz. It’s got the internet talking for several reasons — but most of all, because the results have resonated with people. These results have made them think and take a look inside themselves to try and interpret what they might really mean.
Here’s how VALLEY interprets what your results say about you.
The Soldier
“There will come a soldier
Who carries a mighty sword
He will tear your city down
Oh lei, oh lai, oh, Lord”
The soldier is someone that views the world as a fight to be won. They’re not necessarily an angry person, but they feel a lingering rage toward life at its core. This rage, in turn, becomes a source of strength. If the soldier’s rage is their sword, it is this strength that is their shield. And what is a soldier if not for their strength?
Soldiers are loyal, and they are fierce in their loyalty. They always want to protect and put others first. Secretly, though, they wish someone else would turn it around by putting them first instead. Their strength is the soldier’s biggest virtue but it’s also a weakness — they’re too afraid to ask for help, even when they really need it. They view this as something to be burdening others with. Most of all, the soldier wishes they could lay down their sword and rest.
The Poet
“There will come a poet
Whose weapon is His word
He will slay you with His tongue
Oh lei, oh lai, oh, Lord”
The poet is, at their core, an artist. They’re a friend, they’re a lover, they’re someone with a heart too big for their body. The poet has learned to use their words as weapons. Perhaps, all they’d known before they knew how to defend themselves were words too sharp from everyone around them. It seems only right that the poet has had to see the ugly in the world to be able to appreciate its beauty.
The one person in the room that always holds out hope is the poet. They long for passion, for freedom and for expression — but somewhere, deep down, they also long for stability. Poets might feel inferior to the soldiers and kings of the world, but they are just as important and strong. It is through their words and their art that they are able to make themselves heard.
The King
“There will come a ruler
Whose brow is laid in thorn
Smeared with oil like David’s boy
Oh lei, oh lai, oh, Lord”
The king — a word with so much weight in itself that you can’t imagine the responsibility it would carry. That is exactly what the king wants to escape … the responsibility that they’ve been compelled to take on. They bear the pain of those dear to them, simply because they are needed. The king feels an obligation to be realistic and to prove.
Perhaps taking on roles of extreme responsibility is a way of giving their lives purpose. The king has to matter, or they’re no longer the king. They have to sacrifice their own wants and desires for their responsibilities. Kings, for this reason, often seem to envy the poets of the world. They long for the freedom enjoyed by their counterparts. Their suffering and sacrifices have to mean something in the end, though. If they don’t, then what was it all for in the first place?
While these descriptions and analyses may seem sure of themselves, they may not be accurate to you at all. Maybe you fit none of the three, maybe you fit all of them at once.
Regardless, these identities seem to bring to the surface a lot of the deeper feelings, desires and regrets that we as human beings seem to have.
Did you take the quiz? What were your results and how do you feel about them? Let us know by tagging us @VALLEYmag on Twitter and Instagram!
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