You and your friends have been planning to go out to a fun little dinner and you’ve been excited for weeks. The day before, though, you’re frantically texting the group chat and asking them, “What are we wearing tomorrow?” Of course, this is because the worst possible scenario is that you show up far more overdressed than everyone else in the room.
Choosing what to wear and when to wear it can be tricky. Maybe the idea of appearing out of touch, overly ambitious or just plain awkward when you’re overdressed feels like a lot. But does it have to be that way?
Sure, for some of us being dressed up with a full face of makeup, hair done and a thoroughly planned outfit in a sea of sweatpants and sweatshirts can be a daunting scenario — maybe, though, it’s time to consider the possibility that being “overdressed” isn’t a real thing.
Are You Supposed to Dress a Certain Way?
There’s no denying that there are certain expectations and norms set out for us as to what we should wear in a given scenario. When you’re at work, you wear business casual; when you’re at a wedding or a formal event, you’d probably expect long gown-like dresses and suits; when you’re going out to the bars, you’re going to see a lot of the “jeans and a cute top” combo.
Norms like this exist nearly everywhere and most of society conforms to them. However, that isn’t really necessary. A lot of the times what we perceive as being “overdressed” tends to be nothing but a personalized touch to the norms.
If anything, showing up in an outfit that makes you feel confident, excited and like yourself shouldn’t detract from the experience; it should elevate it. After all, if you feel great, why should it matter how everyone else is dressed?
The Erosion of Dressing Standards
Over the years, societal norms around dressing up have become more relaxed, if not entirely eroded. Personal comfort (see: the number of sweatpants you’d probably see on the daily) is more prioritized now than anything else.
Even in places where you’d think it would be impossible to feel overdressed, it seems like this priority has taken over to a certain extent. These days, it’s not uncommon to see jeans, sneakers or even hoodies in places that used to feel special and elevated by how we dressed — like fancy dinners, the opera or weddings.
Dressing for the day used to be just a simple decision to look one’s best, but now it’s become an exercise in blending in. It’s a reflection of us trying not to appear “too dressed up” in a room that’s chosen to keep it casual.
The Fear of Being “Overdressed”
We have to say it … a lot of the time, the fear of being overdressed comes from the fear of standing out. You want to be seen as special, of course, but not too special to the point that you just look “weird.” Most of us prefer blending in with the crowd and fitting seamlessly into our surroundings.
Wearing a standout outfit can do the opposite and can end up drawing attention we don’t want. At other times, we might instead be worried that dressing up would be interpreted as trying too hard or not being able to “read the room.”
The truth is though … there are no rules. There’s no such thing. “Too much” simply does not exist. In fact, the concept of “overdressing” often just reflects our internal fears rather than a real issue in what we’re wearing. Choosing an outfit that aligns with your personality and makes you feel good shouldn’t be restricted by others’ expectations.
When you’re dressed in something you love, you’re more likely to feel at ease in yourself, regardless of what others are wearing. Instead of overdressing, consider it dressing up for yourself.
Do you ever feel the fear of being overdressed? Let us know by tagging us @VALLEYmag on Instagram or X!
